Respect

Richard Armitage has a right to do/say what he wants. so does every fan in this fandom, whether they are in agreement with his preferences or not.

I LOVE CATS T SHIRT WHITE

When fans chastise other fans by saying ‘if you don’t like what Richard tweets, then don’t read it’, they should also turn that right back around to themselves: don’t like opposition to Richard? then don’t read complaints about him.

"when you point one finger, there are 3 fingers pointing back at you"

‘when you point one finger, there are 3 fingers pointing back at you’

He’s a grown man and can take of himself. no shit, really?! I thought he was an 8 year old orphan with no one to look out for his well being. don’t I feel silly?

'can you walk me home, Ms.Hale? I can't cross the street by myself'

‘would you walk me home, Ms.Hale? I can’t cross the street by myself’

Unwritten fandom rule: don’t speculate about Richard’s actions…unless you agree with them. if you sympathize with him, then feel free to offer up countless explanations about what may be going on in his life that could be influencing his mood. but if you don’t like what he’s doing, then you should just keep your mouth shut, because speculation is intrusive!

sexual fantasies involving his person? Allowed. analysis of his words? Prohibited!

sexual fantasies involving his person? Allowed. analysis of his words? Prohibited!

We did not elect anyone fandom president or sheriff, and do not have a set of official rules. because we areΒ grown adults and can take care of ourselves.

mostly

So in summary: I am allowed to not like the way Richard handles his Twitter account. just as you are allowed to love it and not want to change a thing. let us respect each other.

tumblr_mimuyn8wVR1r0t68go3_250

_______________________

I’d like to give a shout-out to fellow bloggers, Servetus and Perry, to show them some support. they keep us up to date on Richard’s career, doing countless hours of legwork, so that we don’t have to. and they give us a venue to voice our opinions, which is hard to come by in this fandom. all that goes into writing a blog post is time consuming. putting yourself out there when sharing an unpopular view, takes courage.

 

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35 thoughts on “Respect

  1. Servetus says:

    What ??? You heart CATS? Well, it’s all over. I’m never reading your blog again (j/k). Thanks for the appreciation, though!

    I think the contradiction that you’re pointing to is important as an “unwritten rule.” It’s up there with “anyone who doesn’t empathize with Armitage in the way I do is not worthy of my empathy.” Not every fan on Twitter behaves this way, of course, but it’s crushing to read it because the window of things that can be said about Armitage (if not to him) even in jest seems to be narrowing constantly.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve noticed this too, which is why I’ve gone mostly silent on this blog. “jest” is what this blog is built on, and although I’ve not come up against any negativity personally, I see the fandom as a whole losing it’s sense of humor 😦

      Like

  2. Violet says:

    I miss the times when this fandom was mostly fun; when all we had was a letter from him once a year in December. Part of me wishes he had never opened a Twitter account.

    Liked by 2 people

    • all of me wishes he never opened a Twitter account πŸ˜‰ at first, I thought it was funny that he said he didn’t ‘get Twitter’ but then he ended up joining. I soon found the amount of selfies excessive but he was trying to appease the fans and I appreciated his effort. I never found the attempts at “engaging” with fans particularly fun but that’s just a difference in taste that I tried to overlook. by the time the deleting came around though, I was sick of the whole thing. I prefer celebrities who keep that fourth wall intact and make statements they can stand behind, instead of apologizing all of the time and trying to please everyone. just do it, or don’t. the floundering kills my mojo.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Violet says:

        Isn’t ‘Flounder’ the name of one of the characters in ‘The Little Mermaid’? Seriously, though, at this point I wish he’d only post pictures and talked about his projects and the charities he supports. All his Tweets about Brexit ended up making me feel that he was never going to talk about any other topic ever again. Of course, that was silly of me, but – even though I could see he was gutted – I had to step away for a few days. Can we go back in time? πŸ˜‰

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Thanks Kelly! Mutual respect I is really important to me….I don’t prefer a lot of stuff I encounter, but I respect people’s right to define their fandom as they see fit. I would hope for the same respect in return for all. Tomorrow is another day I guess.

    Liked by 2 people

    • exactly. I don’t like/agree with a lot that I see either but as long as it’s not slanderous, then I respect each fan’s right to do it ‘their way’. I don’t have to like it, and I can even complain about it, but I shouldn’t try to take that right away from them.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Hear, hear!
    The level of passive-aggressive judgey Twit rage that spews out whenever RA tweets/deletes or engages/disengages is just silly.
    Then the “bullying” card is dropped faster than a mob of 8 year olds playing Snap.
    If I see one more ‘Poor Richard’ manifesto, I’m gonna LOSE it. πŸ˜‰
    Just kidding. Sorta.

    Like

    • I don’t read the replies to any of his tweets unless someone points a particular stream out to me, and even then I only read a handful of them before I turn away. it’s just a minefield that I don’t want to traverse! they’re either excessively happy and supportive, which makes me sick to my stomach; or they’re argumentative and judgmental, which makes me sick to my stomach as well. Richard should take up blogging, no character limit and much more control over structure and replies πŸ˜€

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      • You forgot to mention the endless streams of tweets on his stream that tag him, but the ensuing conversations, that last for pages, having nothing to do with him at all.

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        • yes! I realize that sometimes people are just replying to the ongoing conversation and don’t realize that he’s been tagged but one has to wonder why he was ever tagged in the first place, other than a blatant “look at me!” attempt. maybe they think he’s going to join in their discussion about preferred dog breeds, or whatever random thing they may be discussing. his intention of “engaging” with fans through Twitter could rightfully give that impression though, so maybe I shouldn’t blame the fans but Richard instead. he needs to be more clear about what his presence on Twitter means and what it doesn’t.

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          • Servetus says:

            Presumably, each of us is cringeworthy to someone — but I always assumed the social contract was I don’t use my cringe to justify trying to shut someone else up and they don’t do it ot me …

            Liked by 2 people

      • meadow68 says:

        May I ask, why does someone leaving comments that are “excessively happy and supportive” make you sick to your stomach? I rarely reply to his tweets but when I do, I’m definitely very happy and very supportive.

        My own stance is similar to a commentor below — I’m always happy to hear from him, and I like seeing the real person behind the image. I don’t consider myself a part of a fandom, so perhaps there is some backstory I’m missing here? I never thought me posting a happy reply tweet would make some other person physically sick.

        Like

        • just a personal preference. it’s not so much the “I’m so excited/I’m so happy for you” type that bother me but more the “you’re so talented/lovely/charming,etc.” they’re like mini fan letters that I feel I shouldn’t be reading. I’m not someone who likes small talk, I dive right into what I want to say, so this applies to Twitter as well; I like substance (which is hard to do in 140 characters, I know). this is how all Twitter streams of famous people are though and that’s why I try to avoid reading them. I only sift through them when I’m trying to get to something specific that I’ve been referenced to. I know this sounds callous, but this was a “soapbox” post. although this blog is generally light and fluffy, I do have a dark side *cue menacing music*…. πŸ˜€

          Liked by 1 person

          • Servetus says:

            I don’t especially like that stuff, either, but that’s an interesting explanation for why it’s troublesome. I have a similar reaction but I hadn’t thought about why.

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          • meadow68 says:

            Oh! Ok I see what you mean. I don’t think Twitter is a place for any kind of substance. There’s just no space for discussion.

            When I comment on HIS tweets, it’s usually to be supportive and say that I either agree, or that I am glad to hear what he thinks, or I really like what he is talking about. I am not one of the people who is a fan of someone until the actual someone shows up, and then gets all bent out of shape. Me, personally – I like the actual person.

            I had an um, “incident”? Encounter? Situation?I don’t know the word to use, but basically it was with him personally, not online, I was a total muppet, and he was overwhelmingly sweet to me.

            I completely understand that you don’t like seeing people gush over someone they don’t even know. It could make anyone cringe.

            Liked by 1 person

          • I don’t like seeing others gush over people they do know either; I have a low tolerance for gushing (all the more ironic that I have a fan blog…). I do like when Richard shows his real colors, especially his sense of humor, but that doesn’t mean I’m always going to like what those colors are. the pitfalls of being human πŸ™‚ at any rate, I’m glad he was sweet to you even when you weren’t at your best. I doubt most of us would be, no matter the situation πŸ˜€

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  5. Maria says:

    Bravo!! Well said.. I don’t know what it is about the Richard fandom, that makes people lose their shit.. I too don’t agree with what some fans say about Richard, but I respect their opinion and don’t harpoon them… Just like there are some things I don’t like that Richard does..but I respect that too.. Lol.. I must say, I have said that on many an occasion…”he’s a grown man and doesn’t need our protection” πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚.. When I say that, I mean that if he doesn’t like what someone has said about him. Let him deal with the person directly.. Not have a few fans harpoon that person on his behalf.. I wish that everyone would be more respectful towards one another.. πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

    Like

    • the “grown man” defense started out with good intentions, but then fans began to use it as a high handed rap on the knuckles that became seriously overplayed. any time you disagree with something that Richard has said or done, the “grown man” statement is whipped out in a condescending attempt to shut you up. along with a bunch of mentions about his “rights”. while there are fans who want to coddle him, and fans who disagree with anything just to disagree, there are also those of us who have concerns that we just want acknowledged. we don’t want to take away anyone’s “rights”. if our complaints spark a (mature) discussion, then great! if not, then at least we’ve had our say and no longer feel the weight of words unsaid weighing us down. others don’t see it that way though, they think we’re out to change the fandom and take away their fun :/

      Liked by 2 people

  6. Kathy Jones says:

    I only get twitter news second or third hand, thanks to bloggers like Serv and Perry. But even at that low level of engagement I find the tweeting and deleting annoying. It makes me wish Richard could be seen and not heard, but then I remember his voice and realize that won’t work. How about seen and not tweeted?

    Like

    • I’ve always wondered what Richard “off the cuff” would look like, since he always seems to be so on his game in interviews and appearances. Twitter has given me a glimpse of that, but it’s not what I expected it to be. I thought it would be witty, slightly adolescent, and maybe a bit scatterbrained. I did see some of that, in the beginning, but what it morphed into made my fears about him joining Twitter a reality. maybe he should do podcasts instead? give him space to ramble while we luxuriate in his voice. sounds like a win/win situation to me!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. SueBC says:

    Certainly from my point of view, not being a blogger myself or on Twitter, it truly enriches my fandom experience to be able to read all the different points of view and styles. The posts of appreciation of RA in various aspects, as well as the humour and analysis and discussion, all have value and all can exist in the fandom. Thanks to all of those who do blog and who engage in a respectful way with each other. Keep on doing what you’re doing.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Julia says:

    Maybe the best way for all fandome is just try to take things easier. Not to lament every time RA delets his tweet and not to look for undertones in his tweets and its deleting. I often read some fans say they never saw such “battles” between the fans in other fandomes. So what’s wrong with this one?.. It’s we, the fans, who create the fandome’s atmosphere. Then more tolerance maybe ?. I hope Richard keeps his tweeter account. I appreciate he shares his thoughts, his personal opinions, pics and upcoming projects info with us. Hope he continues doing it. To wish he doesn’t have Twitter account or use it for promotion only is like to deprive yourself of the opportunity to know him better, to understand him better IMO.

    Liked by 1 person

    • while it would be less stressful if we were all mellow and just took things as they came, not everyone is wired that way. and sometimes you need to get a little fired up in order to have meaningful and engaging discussions. we’re not all here for the same reasons, what we crave from the fandom experience varies from person to person (and can change over time). I’ve been in other fandoms before, and anyone who tells you that the RA fandom is “the worst” for drama, intolerance, etc. is just letting off steam b/c all fandoms are that way, it just depends on what level you are involved. seeing a different side of Richard through his Twitter account has been enlightening to me, in both good and bad ways. as of late it’s made me feel unbalanced and anxious. my reaction is my responsibility, not Richard’s, but instead of just walking away without a word, I’m going to voice my displeasure. this will open up communication between those who feel the same as me and those who don’t, and if I’m lucky, maybe I’ll learn something; b/c that’s how I work through conflict. I don’t expect everyone to be like me though, and I appreciate you sharing how Richard on Twitter makes you happy. continue to be happy, don’t let those with negative opinions make you feel like you’re doing something wrong; there’s enough room for all of us πŸ™‚ the problems arise when we try to restrict everyone to one corner, when we have a whole convention center at our disposal.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Servetus says:

      The problem is that each fan’s version of “take it easy” differs from each other fan’s. Wouldn’t toleration include toleration for those fans who don’t “take it easier”? I’m thinking in particular of the split in the fandom around the Hobbit films. Some Armitage fans were already Hobbit/Tolkien fans and a segment of them really disliked the films. Even the Hobbit/Tolkien fans who didn’t dislike the films were much more involved in listening and analyzing at a detail level what was being said about the films in promotion, and so on. They were super committed and a lot of times they were frustrated or angry about things that made me think “huh?” or roll my eyes. The thing not to do in that situation, as I learned, is to say “take it easier.” The more someone loves the thing they are talking about, the more the advice not to take something so seriously hurts because in essence it is a personal reproach in that context.

      I don’t think Twitter allows us to know him better, frankly. I think it gives that illusion, though, as well as the illusion that we could really speak to him.

      Liked by 2 people

  9. Chazak says:

    Well expressed, KellyDS! I feel much the same. I read only what I like or can handle, letting others express what they wish to, but I find myself shaking my head a lot lately! The fun has certainly seemed be less lately. The sense of humor I love (dry and witty ) is often chastened for no reason. Too many mother hens all around! Thank you for writing, and yes, absolutely thanks to those who write from the heart. Their courage and the ability to write uncensored is important! Servetus and Perry, you help keep the fandom rolling!

    Liked by 3 people

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