Worth the Effort

Music & More Challenge

33.) character that reminds you of your Dad/Mom

I’ve stated that John Porter reminds me of my Father, so I’m going to go the female route with this one and answer: Carol Bolton reminds me of my Mother.

Mom’s reaction to me painting the room red would have differed from Carol’s. greatly.

Unlike others, I do have a favorable impression of Carol. Who we think is best for John comes from our own desires and not necessarily what he wants or needs himself. so I think a lot of the negative judgements towards Carol are biased in this regard.

I will love him and squeeze him and call him...Ralph
I will love him and squeeze him and call him Ralph

My mom shares some personality traits with Carol and she’s also had to fight against the negative judgements of others. Nothing as dire as Carol’s past has plagued my Mom but there are reasons why she reacts the way that she does.

In both cases, I see it as an unconscious defense mechanism for them: whoever is able to get past the protective walls, is someone who isn’t going to give up and walk away. whoever gets past the walls, already knows she’s worth the effort.


music question: a song that reminds you of your Mom/Dad

Taylor Swift’s “The Best Day”

because of this:


I’m thirteen now and don’t know how my friends could be so mean

I come home crying and you hold me tight and grab the keys

And we drive and drive until we’ve found a town far enough away

And we talk and window shop until I’ve forgotten all their names



we did this often during my teenage years. I needed to know that I was worth the effort too.


7 thoughts on “Worth the Effort

  1. This post is really well done. I think there at least used to be a tendency to be negative about characters that didn’t treat Armitage characters well (and sometimes also about the actresses, which bugged me more), but I haven’t seen it much lately. Then again we spend a lot less time talking about his roles the last year or so …

    I admire Carol for continuing to stick up for herself after all that abuse. She still has some kind of self-esteem to fuel that bravado (even if it’s mostly desperation by the end of the series). She sure didn’t just give up and give in.


    1. I actually have plans to revisit the different RA characters and their stories. regardless of how Richard brings his particular characters alive, I think he always chooses stories that are good in and of themselves (yes, even Robin Hood!)
      as for Carol: I admire her tenacity, the need to protect Lisa and provide for her, but also to show that she isn’t going to be conquered by her circumstances. that will benefit Lisa greatly as she grows into a woman 😎


  2. On first viewing I disliked Carol…a lot. Over repeated viewings I have come to greathly admire her. She is strong and took care of Lisa and sacrificed for Lisa by staying. And actually, I think she has been very good for John. He grew and came out of his shell and I like to think that after the trauma of Andrews death subsides a bit Carol feelings for John grow from affection and gratitude to real love…(real love instead of the obsessive crazy love between her and Andrew). She did stick with John instead of running off with Andrew when she had the chance…I think she did love John already. I think she was truthful all along with John and treated him well but it is not so clear because of Andrew’s presence.


    1. the other thing is that as an abused person herself, she knows that other people with wounds can’t simply be loved to death — there are barriers there and sometimes an indirect approach is best. And she doesn’t lie to him, she promises him what she can give.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. I didn’t love Carol the first time I saw her either but that was a knee-jerk reaction in response to my protectiveness towards John. I realized that she is what he wanted and I think they are what each other needed. I think she trusted John, and that was more important to her than any kind of romantic passion.


  3. Very late to the party, but I felt sorry for Carol. I thought she was a crap mother in some ways, but she didn’t exactly have good role models in the parental department.
    I also understood how and why she treated John the way she did, so although I think he deserved better treatment, she was what he wanted, so I have to feel that he was happier with her than without her.

    Liked by 1 person

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